The best Christmas gift I could have imagined didn't get wrapped up and put under the tree. It wasn't something I knew I wanted or needed. It was something I'll treasure for a long time.
What was it? I let go.
I let go of wanting to do everything this holiday. I let go of feeling like I was a failure if I didn't get everything done. I let go of a lot of the pressure I put on myself to do things just because everyone else is doing them. I let go of my deadlines and my to-do lists and my expectations of myself.
It feels amazing.
I didn't just give this gift to myself. I had the support of my loving husband, who always wants me to be happy. My brother and his girlfriend stepped in and let me switch our Christmas eve dinner to their house instead of mine. Everyone in my life is being extremely patient with me. I couldn't be more grateful.
I don't know what it is about this year, but I couldn't muster the excitement I normally do. It's terribly disappointing, because Christmas is my favorite holiday. I love to decorate our house, shop for gifts, bake Christmas cookies and so on.
I shopped for gifts, but the majority of the things I'm giving are homemade.
I put up two tiny trees decorated with a simple button garland, and I framed this print:
That's it, nothing else. {Feel free to click on the image to expand it, and save it for your personal use.} I brought up some other decorations from the basement, but I'll pack them all away tonight.
I didn't bake a single Christmas cookie. I'll put together a few things at the last minute, and I asked my grandma to make my very favorite cookies from my childhood. Everyone will survive.
The thing is...Christmas isn't about all that. And it feels good to come to that realization - that Christmas won't be ruined because I didn't do these things. I'm not saying that decorating or gift shopping or baking are wrong. Traditions are so much fun, especially at Christmas. But for me, this year, I need to just enjoy some time off. Spend some time with family and friends. Stop stressing.
I've been able to spend more time with my family this year. Tonight, my brother & his girlfriend, my nephew Michael, the hubs and I are going to pile into a car and drive around the area to look at Christmas lights. It was so cool to have my brother tell me he wanted to go to this elaborately decorated farm we used to visit as kids. I wanted to go there too, but didn't want to ask everyone to endure the long trip with me. So glad my brother wants his son to experience the same things we did as kid.
I'm excited for the possibilities the new year will bring. There's so much on the horizon and I can't wait to see how it all turns out. I'm already starting to feel energized about my 2012 Project Life {and my resolution to actually use it throughout the year instead of waiting til then end!} I also have some exciting news to share {hopefully soon} about a new direction for Vogt Design Co.
I probably won't be blogging again before Christmas, so I hope everyone who is reading has a very happy holiday season and has the opportunity to enjoy the blessings in your lives!
Good for you! The holidays are all about friends and family time. Everything else will fall into place, if it's meant to be. I miss you! Maybe sometime we can get together and hang out. Have a great Christmas and New Year's! :)
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